Deposits and Withdrawls – What’s your balance?

“You can think of relationships – in the marketplace and in your personal life – as a set of deposits and withdrawls. At JetBlue, devotion over the years of being people-friendly was a major deposit. The Valentine’s Day massacre was a big withdrawal. Expressing a genuine, heartfelt apology, offering compensation, and creating the Customer Bill of Rights were new deposits that helped the company recoup public confidence.” – Peterson

I like the metaphor of banks here. Everyone knows what a bank is. They store your money. You put in $100 one week. You take out $100 the other week. Take out too much money and you go into overdraft – we’re all guilty of this at some point in our lives.

It’s a zero sum game. You’re not going to get rich leaving your money in the bank.

In order for money to be useful it must be used.

Consider actions that strengthen relationships:

  • Calling when we haven’t heard from our friends in a while.
  • Texting a friend, “Happy Birthday!!!!!!”
  • Buying a round of drinks.
  • Saying “Thank you.”
  • Saying, “I’m sorry.”
  • Treating your friends friends as friends
  • Picking up the tab.
  • Telling someone they look nice today.
  • Listening.

Next, consider actions that weaken relationships:

  • Failing to celebrate the achievements of your friends.
  • Not calling your Mom on her birthday.
  • Forgetting important details.
  • Not really listening when your friend is telling a story.
  • Taking control of the situation without asking for feedback.
  • Not really caring
  • Not returning calls
  • Ghosting

“Trust inescapably contemplates risk.” – Peterson

With these ideas firmly in place, consider the ways that you are taking and not giving back. Mary consistently goes out with us. But she never offers to buy the next round. Instead she soaks up the good times and doesn’t refill the petty cash.

Don’t be like Mary. Repay your friends and colleagues  for the withdrawls you make. Buy the next round. Celebrate the achievements of your co-workers. Don’t be a user. Be a schmoozer!

“Life is a carnival ride and a game of dice.”

How much have you benefited from the deposits of your friends and family? What’s your balance? Gained something? Out of balance? Pay it back and we all benefit 🙂

Author: David Neely

Professional Software Developer. Technology and Web Coordinator at the University of Hawaii's Manoa Career Center.